White House Down

"Quick, Jamie!  Let's go see a different movie!"

I know I'm a bit late on this one, but don't worry.  You aren't missing anything if you haven't seen it yet.  White House Down represents a laughable squandering of a potentially thrilling premise.  Amidst the explosions, the highlight of the film is Joey King, the just-turned-14-years-old actress who plays the part of Emily in the film.  The young actress's resume already features impressive work including The Conjuring, Crazy, Stupid Love,  and even a small role in The Dark Knight Rises.  And her name is strangely very similar to mine...

The film is littered with cliches, subpar visual effects, and poorly executed action sequences.  Its third act walked a line so closely to The Office's "Threat Level Midnight" episode that it risked turning into a comedy.  White House Down features a number of "plot twists" that only serve to make the film bloated and overbearing.  Very few of the characters' motives actually make sense.  

          White House Down (2013)                           Die Hard (1988)

Take a film like Die Hard, which is the most natural comparison to make for a film like this.  Everything Die Hard does right, White House Down does wrong.  Die Hard has a simple, high concept premise with little need for unnecessary digressions, a hero who's badass but not superhuman, perfectly executed action sequences, and one helluva memorable villain.  White House Down features Jamie Foxx as a president who has an affinity for Jordans... literally.  

As the first few minutes of White House Down were underway, I was surprised by how many actors I recognized who were no where to be found in much of the film's marketing... James Woods, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Richard Jenkins, & Jason Clarke, to name a few.  Perhaps their agents recommended avoiding association with this debacle.  You should, too.  

Rating: 1 / 5

SKIP IT

Note: I don't own the rights to any of the photos on this website.  They're copied here from Google images for entertainment purposes only.

The Wolverine (2013)

I feel that this review should start with a disclaimer: I am not a comic book aficionado. This isn't to say that I don't like them, but rather that the only graphic novels I have read are Watchmen and the occasional Spiderman when I was younger.  Therefore, I can't really comment on how the movie stacks up against the source material and judge it only as a film itself and as part of a series.  I mention this here because The Wolverine would, I think, be most enjoyed by fans of the comics.

Regardless, this edition to the X-Men canon is a considerable step up from the abysmal X-Men Origins: Wolverine, which managed to blend every action cliche with mutant-sized monotony.  The Wolverine starts off which an interesting sequence that plays with chronology (a notion that will be further explored in the upcoming X-Men: Days of Future Past).  When the time jumps settle down, the film finds its titular hero in what I assume to be "present day," after the events from X-Men: The Last Stand. If you're still on board, that's a good sign that you might actually enjoy the film and be able to comprehend the events and their significance.

The Wolverine introduces a number of new faces and a welcomed change in scenery, Japan.  What the film lacks is a truly formidable foe, but rather it's more about Wolverine/Logan's inner struggles and his purpose in life.  We are shown multiple dreamlike sequences in which Logan "interacts" with Jean Grey, who was supposedly killed in The Last Stand and seems to be central to his decision to go into early superhero retirement - both literally and figuratively.  As we learn from the extra credits scene, however, death is never really permanent in the X-Men / comics universe.  The film introduces the idea of Wolverine as a "ronin", a samurai without a master, which clearly defines his character.  As always, Hugh Jackman seems a natural fit for the role, and this film thankfully allows his character to have a brain (or at least moral dilemmas) to match his brawn.  Also featured are a number of nicely done action sequences.  One such scene is atop a bullet train that is as spectacular as it is preposterous, but entertaining nonetheless.  The Japanese aesthetic works for the X-Men universe, and the film steers the franchise in the right direction.  I just hope that what's up next (i.e. Days of Future Past) will blow it out of the water.

I saw the film in 3-D... take it or leave it.  Stick around for the extra credits scene.

Rating: 3.5 / 5 


Note: I don't own the rights to any of the photos on this website.  They're copied here from Google images for entertainment purposes only.

The Conjuring

You have to look despite being afraid of what you might find.

Finally!  A modern horror movie that's worthy of admission!  The Conjuring is a rather ingenious modern horror flick.  The best moments of the film direct you to look in one direction, then the scare comes at you from another.  It's tense and genuinely creepy.  The Conjuring benefits from a fine cast, seasoned direction from James Wan (whose creepy credits include Saw and Insidious), and atmospheric thrills.  Though it treads on multiple familiar horror themes (picture perfect family moving into a perfectly creepy haunted house, witchcraft, demonic possession, ghostly dolls, "based on a true story", etc.), I'm awarding it full marks because it was solidly entertaining and expertly crafted.  The film is far from boring or overly serious to the point of ridicule.  Director James Wan plays with your expectations right up until the final moments of the film, making for a modern horror film that's worthy of its title.  Its R rating, however, is more interesting.  According to MPAA, The Conjuring is rated R for "sequences of disturbing violence and terror."  Don't most PG-13 horror films also fit that description.  Perhaps the MPAA is simply a compliment, suggesting that the film is too damn scary for a PG-13 rating.  Agreed.

Rating: 5 / 5 

A note I left for my roommate to come home (alone) to after seeing the film.

Note: I don't own the rights to any of the photos on this website.  They're copied here from Google images for entertainment purposes only.

Much Ado About Nothing (Dir. Joss Whedon)

Joss Whedon can pretty much do anything.  His Much Ado About Nothing deftly blends a classic work of literature with innovative, modern filmmaking.  And he made it shortly after completing one of the highest grossing films of all time - The Avengers.  The film is fun, fresh, beautifully shot, and light on its feat.  Plus I'm a sucker for black & white.  For this one, I broke my usual rule of avoiding reading "source material" before seeing the film version.  But seeing as this is Shakespeare, I figured I'd make an exception.  Though I did read the play, Whedon's film would likely be enjoyed by anyone in search of a jazzy re-imagining of a classic work.  The actors all embrace their roles totally, and after about a few minutes of getting used to the "Shakespeare speak" it just sounds like witty dialogue.  And Dogberry is an absolute hoot.  Gender-swap Conrad was a nice touch and so well executed that the casual observer wouldn't even notice it.  Many of Shakespeare's thematics are timeless.  Under the helm of a skilled director like Whedon, Much Ado About Nothing is an immensely entertaining summer affair.  The only problem is finding a theater that's playing it amongst all the summer blockbusters.

Rating: 5 / 5

Note: I don't own the rights to any of the photos on this website.  They're copied here from Google images for entertainment purposes only.

June 2013 Animated Films

Hello!
Both of these films represent admirable (albeit inevitable), creative, and entertaining animated films which feature humor that audiences of any age can appreciate... which is why they make a huge amount of money!  Sequel rant aside... I was laughing throughout and recommend them both.
Enjoy!

Despicable Me 2

• Despicable Me 2 finds its place at the crossroads between family film, spy adventure action, and some kind of Latino fiesta (EL MACHO!).  You'll know what I mean after watching.  At any rate, this sequel is just as fun as the original!  Gru and the gang are all back.  Yes, that includes Dave, Larry, Kevin, and all the other similarly named minions.  I was happy to see the return of Dr. Nefario and his "speedy" transports as well.  Despicable Me 2 continues much of the thematics from part 1 (i.e. Gru torn between good and evil... and the adventures of being a parent) while adding the potential for a love interest.  The flashbacks to Gru as a child are always tragically hilarious.  A key departure from the original is the delay in revealing the film's villain, which I think was a wise choice.  We are given the set up and the list of usual suspects, but the evil mastermind isn't revealed until well into the film.  There are some truly hilarious moments and clever twists on familiar cliches.  The film also makes nice use of the 3-D technology which often feels more at home and less clunky in animated features.  It was difficult to say whether the jokes were actually that funny or if it was Steve Carell's delightful (as always) performance as Gru that had me laughing... but I was laughing nonetheless.  Plus, who can't relate to those minions?
• Recommended in 3-D
• Rating: 4.5 / 5 ... SEE IT!

Monsters University

• Another nice follow up to the original!  This one's a prequel that follows Mike & Sully through their college scare training in a sort of animated geeks vs. jocks showdown.  Our heroes end up joining Oozma Kappa fraternity (chanting "we're OK!  we're OK!").  The set up is a series of "scare competitions" between rival school organizations that makes for both a proven plot device and an opportunity to showcase entertaining, Revenge of the Nerds style fun.  It's a nostalgic trip back a few years for college grads and an enjoyable one for youngsters as well.  I particularly liked one of the opening scenes (pictured above) where all the college student volunteers' names rhymed with each other.  Clever & hilarious.  Similar sequences poke fun at other college cliches and cliques which you can't help but laugh at.  There are a number of nice references to the first film, which help carry the film along and pique the keen viewer's interest, as well as some welcomed newcomers.  Monsters University seems less polished (and unfortunately less jazzy) than the original but nonetheless offers another edition to the Pixar canon that represents its predecessors well.
• 3-D... take it or leave it
• EASTER EGGS (I love these) HERE: http://www.businessinsider.com/monsters-university-easter-eggs-2013-6
• I'm sorry to say that I missed the Pizza Planet truck despite looking diligently... 
• Rating: 4.5 / 5 ... SEE IT!

Note: I don't own the rights to any of the photos on this website.  They're copied here from Google images for entertainment purposes only.

Grown Ups 2

For those looking for a review of Grown Ups 2, here it is:

I will not be seeing Grown Ups 2.  At least not in theaters or in any way that I will have to spend time or money to watch it.

This decision was based solely on how much I disliked the "original" and made before seeing the hilarious consensus on RT:  "While it's certainly the movie event of the year for filmgoers passionate about deer piss humor, Grown Ups 2 will bore, annoy, and disgust audiences of nearly every other persuasion."

June 2013 Summer Action Flicks

World War Z

• The crowning achievements in World War Z are its beginning and end.  The middle is all zombie-filled, choppily edited mush.  Thankfully, the first and third acts are actually quite good so the film is all-in-all entertaining.  There are several supporting characters whose screen time was cut too short (i.e. the virologist and his "mother nature as a serial killer" dialogue) and some missed opportunities to explore some potentially interesting subplots, but I suspect they might resurface in the inevitable sequel(s).  Brad Pitt has a pretty amazing track record and can carry even a narratively messy film on his shoulders, even with that pseudo-mullet of his.  I thought the story (didn't read the book) came up with a pretty ingenious method to combat the zombie epidemic and offered one of the most creative solutions to beating the undead I have seen.  Without giving away too much, the idea of the "camouflage" and the final sequences in the WHO research facility in Wales were pretty stellar and weighed heavily on my impression of the film.  The notion of a global epidemic has been an interesting cinematic topic in recent years (i.e. Soderbergh's Contagion) and one which I find quite compelling on screen.  If you overlook the numerous plot holes and the jumble that is the film's second act, you'll find a satisfying zombie summer action movie with a few nice surprises.
• Rating: 4 / 5

Man of Steel

• Thank the comic book movie gods Russell Crowe was in this movie.  The aussie's presence was the highlight of this promising-but-somewhat-of-a-letdown take on the Superman lore.  In Man of Steel, Superman surprisingly doesn't really get the hero status that he deserves.  The film is littered with frequent flashbacks that serve to highlight his backstory but unfortunately also prevent us from connecting with Henry Cavill's portrayal of the titular superhero.  I'm curious what percentage of Superman lines belonged to the young actors portraying young Clark Kent and what percentage belonged to Mr. Cavill.... The opening sequences are impressive, but the film then falters when the setting changes to Earth.  Too many things are being attempted at once and none really works.  It's difficult to make a Superman movie and truly make audiences feel a sense of danger for our beloved hero.  This one succeeds in terms of visual spectacle, but altogether feels like it should've been much grander than the final product.
• Rating: 2.5 / 5